When the Internet Fails...

June 25, 2016

I recently put a call out on Facebook for the new "scheme" that bibliophiles and book-porn addicts alike have cooked up. You may have seen it. The claim is that if 6 people like your status, you must send just one person a copy of your favorite book, and in return you will receive 36 books.

I was skeptical at first. I thought "what?" many a time. But then I looked into it and realized that you aren't receiving books from your six status-likers, but from the six people each of them in turn gets to like their statuses.

Math. It works.

Sadly, nobody liked my status. And I mean nobody. Not the metaphorical "oh that's just a nobody" type nobody. There has never been less than 0 people in the world, but if there was a number that captured that concept, that would be the number of people who liked my status.

Thanks, internet. You are no help to me.

This brings about a sort of awakening for me. People are notorious for scrounging the web for drama without providing any of their own. Or, more commonly, searching for funny memes and giving none in return. I'm a horrible example of this. I use the internet without updating my own Twitter, for heaven's sake, while constantly bemoaning the fact my favorite authors, agents, and booky tweeters of all types don't tweet fast enough or often enough. I'm a terrible blogger. Also, I got rid of most of my Facebook friends.

The internet didn't fail me. I failed the internet. I just don't give it the time it deserves. Now I have no friends, apparently.

I'd follow these musings up with a claim that I shall be better in the future, but we all know that isn't the case! So, instead, I offer hugs. Lots of hugs. Hugs make everything better.